MuttonChops

During my life, each year has entered in new fashion. As a young child, I remember my parents going out for the evening with friends. As a teen, I babysat for neighborhood kids while their parents went out (often with my own parents!). I have been to a few New Year's Eve parties but most of my years were spent safe and sound by the television. I've been wide awake and snoozing, sick, well, and tipsy. I've spent it alone more times than I care to mention and spent it with someone special. As I reflect on years past, I recall the various celebrities that have rung in the year. Not being a television historian, I can't be certain who the first was, but I do know for many years, Guy Lombardo was the leader of the band (pun intended). Dick Clark soon took to the streets of New York counting down with the rest of the nation. I have to wonder if youth of today realize what an icon Clark is and how much he influenced music and television from radio to "American Bandstand...

Often my commentary here makes a point about how people follow blindly and fail to think or do things for themselves. I also get aggrevated with people who, in my opinion, behave inappropriately. I wanted to share a couple of anecdotes from this week as testimony that I am not always snipping at people and to lead by example. In no way am I trying to break my arm by patting myself on the back nor am I seeking kudos of any sort. I honestly hope that by sharing, I can create a " Pay it Forward " kind of atmosphere. Two young girls left an interesting message on my voicemail the other night. I would estimate their ages to be around 10 or 12 and they were trying to create a three-way conference call with a friend. One of them did most of the talking and explained, "We are sorry but we got the wrong number. We were trying to reach our friend and must have dialed wrong." She was very clear, to the point and asked me to excuse the call. Impressed by her politeness and deme...

I need to get busy with a couple of last minute holiday preparations but find myself thinking about several people at the moment that have guided my behaviors and beliefs. What better time to share such contemplations than on Christmas Eve? Many years ago, I worked in a large office building, analyzing health insurance claims. A young co-worker maintained an altar at her desk with various items such as a Christian calendar, her Bible, reference books and scripture dust-catchers. She read during her lunch break and I had to give credit to someone that was a wild-child-turned-holy-saint. One day she perched on my desk top as I worked. "Iris, can I ask you a personal question?" "Sure." I stopped and leaned back in my chair. "Iris, have you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour?" Her face showed lines of deep concern. "Well ... yeah Melanie, I have." "When?" "Gee, ummm, well ..." I thought about my affirmation in the Meth...

Yes - I said it and not politely. What IS it with people that tailgate? I am not a bad driver. I try to keep reasonably close to the speed limit and hope I don't get a ticket. I stay off the tail of the person in front of me, too. Yet there is always the driver that HAS to go faster than everyone else. They have the obsession of being first and can think of no one else but themselves. Sure, it's old news but today was an exception. I had my car worked on over the last week which was unnerving enough as I was without transportation for about 5 days. When I hit the gas, it would go but had started jolting or acting like it wasn't getting gas. The mechanic, who I have dealt with for 10 years, said it was probably the air intake thingy (he said it better than I can) and would be about $500 bucks for the part. Once he got into the engine, he said he felt it was just the hoses leading to the filter - much cheaper and easier to repair. There was a delay with the parts but I picked...

We've all had experiences where a simple transaction is blocked because of a rule. Thanks to some idiot that abused a privledge, the rule was established and we now have to jump through hoops. I understand why rules are set and generally try to conform rather than ask for an exception. Once in a blue moon, exceptions can be justified and should be made. Karen "DeafMom" Putz had just such a circumstance in her local Illinois public library. Her daughter, also deaf, was to attend a production of "The Christmas Carol" with her class. A series of events left her without an interpreter and a suitable option was to obtain the captioned video. The Putz ladies headed for the nearest library, though not the one that receives the family's tax dollars. A reciprocal agreement allows for the loan of non-fiction videos. Fictional videos require a $100 annual fee plus $1 per loan. Karen explained the entire situation and the librarian confirmed the captioned video was not...

A mother leaves her two-year-old daughter alone in a car that is double-parked with the engine running. Mom is inside a home chit-chatting while a tow truck leaves with the car . Why are the two men, doing their job, being charged with felony child endangerment? What is more dangerous than leaving a child in an unattended car? Not only did mom leave the child alone, she wasn't watching the car at all, or else she would have seen the men around it. Until my children were old enough to unfasten their own seatbelts and handle a door lock, I never left them alone in the car. Too many stories circulated about moms leaving the engine running to run in and pay for gas, returning to find their car stolen with the child still inside. Granted, anyone taking my kids would probably have done a u-turn, brought them back and offered apologies and sympathy. Children are a responsibility. They have to be nurtured, cared for and taught how to behave. Which brings me to another point - once your kid...

My mother is always consoling herself by saying things like, "Well, it could be worse ..." or "Other people have problems, too." In response, I share a lesson I learned a long time ago: "Don't minimize your problems - we each have our own reality to deal with." Kudos to a very wise therapist as this has stuck with me and, combined with the bits and pieces I've assembled to form my own conclusions about religious issues, I've managed to survive in spite of great odds. I try not to wallow in personal quagmires and avoid being over-confident because karma has a way of kicking my ass hard when I stray too far from center ground. Perhaps my spirituality is so well-grounded because there is no possible explanation for the cosmic messages I receive on a regular and direct basis. Some folks ask "why" things happen or assume they are a magnet for bad luck. When someone rich and famous gives sincere thanks, I smile and believe they are blessed...

I literally grew up in the land of retail. My father was a drug store manager and my mom usually worked on and off with him. Waaaay back in those days, child labor was a given. Rather than hire a sitter, my parents set me up on a box pricing items when I was 5 years old. By 11, I knew how to run a register, count change and “ Paper Moon ” was a quick study against flim-flam artists. I didn’t whine and generally enjoyed the feeling of being helpful. Customer service was priority and when on duty, I called dad “Mr. Carter.” At the same time, I learned how frustrating and aggressive the shopping public can be. Today’s events at a Long Island Wal-Mart proved to me that shoppers have gotten to a point of literally killing someone over a bargain. Retail work is grueling, underpaid, and thankless. No one appreciates a well-stocked shelf or an uncluttered toy aisle, but the minute an item is off the shelf, John Q. Public is annoyed and griping. Today, some poor clerk got in the way of an obn...

During the holidays, we see more hands out and more hand-outs during the giving season. We are giving thanks, giving gifts and, of course, giving what we can to others. While all this serves great purpose, there are underlying currents that keep my soul stirred. Too often I see people who use donations as a way to make themselves feel better without any real thought to what their giving means to the recipient. In essence, the donor is giving blindly, patting himself on the back and no further thought is given to the charity. Others give as though it were a burden and they are leveling the karma playing field. Squeezing out donations is a painful process for them and, like giving birth to a child, they see their effort as one that will pay off in the future when the roll is called up yonder. Some people give because they don't want to be bothered. They give to the first in line and then announce to the rest, "Leave me alone, I've already given." On the other side of th...

Until now, my experiences in watching the power of Twitter in action from day to day has been like going from skates with keys to a Lambourgini . Today's TwitteReaction to Motrin's newest ads took me to Mach 1. Coinciding with International Baby Wearing Week , the Motrin ad attempts to connect with aches and pains of motherhood focusing on the strain of carrying a tot in a sling. Moms (and dads) go through a lot of pain out of love for their kids. However, the ad has become a royal pain in the ass for folks that see it as a slam. TwitteReaction has tracked comments ranging from disdain over Motrin's implication that baby slings are a fashion statement to seeking sincere retractions from the company. While parents are sending signals over slandered slings and issuing kudos over effective social media efforts, Tweeters in another corner are recommending Motrin for dads dealing with the manic moms and suggest the squealers put forth similar efforts into more justifiable ...

While some folks are trying to keep church out of politics, a South Carolina priest is putting politics on the front pew, telling his flock to flee communion if they voted for Obama. Instead of keeping them in church and teaching his parishioners why he thinks they should repent and why Obama is supposedly so baaaad for allowing freedom of choice, the patron saint of polls is dipping into the holy water and washing his hands of them. I do want to at least thank the Father for giving us a steadfast example of “throwing the baby out with the bath water.” Obama’s stance on abortion rights was pretty low on the list of important issues facing Americans so if this priest had to go through the higher points before reaching one that went against his church standards, I’d say there’s a lot of reasons to be FOR our president-elect! I always thought Christians taught forgiveness, tolerance and understanding. Yet some people seem to think that they have risen to such high esteem in God’s eyes t...

No bull about it, a source has herded together a list of donors that funded the California Proposition 8 campaign. As I perused the list, a number of thoughts came to mind. Rather than keep my quandries quiet, my points will be pondered here. Donating to a poltical cause is public information which translated means "putting your money where your mouth is." Where you spend money speaks volumes if the right people are observant. Sarah Palin shifted responsibility to the Republican National Committee for spending big bucks at Saks Fifth Ave. and denies ownership of the purchases. PETA is known for stalking furriers and TMZ points out the stars of Starbucks. Companies vie for celebrity endorsements in marketing efforts. As consumers, we should be savvy and determine whether a product meets our needs and if the producer compromises our beliefs in any way. Most little lambs are inclined to travel down the chute, grabbing from the trough while being sheared without considering thei...

On January 1, 1994 I had been married 11 years and had two small children. My husband and I sat down to talk about the problems we were having. It was a new year and I was creating an opportunity to start fresh. Our arguments and his general mood had progressively worsened. He wasn’t happy and neither was I. The discussion was sane and amicable but the lines were drawn. We both needed to commit 100 percent to mending the relationship or there was no need in going further. He agreed but wanted time to think. As we both took in a deep breath, I felt like I had literally been hit with a lightening bolt. I don’t know where the question came from or why I asked at that moment. I certainly wasn’t prepared for the answer. “You’re gay, aren’t you?” He paused and responded, “Yes.” Tears welled up in his eyes. I crossed the room to where he was sitting and knelt down, hugging him, reassuring him. “It’s okay,” I said. “At least now I know what is wrong and why you’ve been so miserable.” He hadn’t...

When I finished the video I asked my 19-year-old son if he wanted to see it. "Sure," he said. After watching it he said, "Good song." Such a dry sense of humor, that kid. "What about the pictures?" "I see them all the time." "What? My photos?" "No - trees - they're everywhere." I gave him a look. He chuckled in amusement and said, "Well, maybe after I spend eight months in the desert I'll be more excited about seeing pictures like that." He is going in the Army in a couple of weeks. He'll need that humor, just like I needed mine to raise him."

This was a stellar day with temperatures in the upper 70s and still riding the victory train from election day, I decided to take full advantage. Grabbing my camera, I headed out on errands and stopped at a couple of parks that are literally just a few miles from me. Even the horses next door were grazing next to the fence and looked when I called. I enjoyed walking in the park because it had purpose. I wasn't just walking because I "should." I was taking pictures and taking in my surroundings. Fresh air and sunshine did my spirit good. I was able to revisit some places I haven’t seen in a while and along the way met a couple of interesting people. Memories of raising my own children were dusted off when I encountered a couple with two young children. I smiled hearing exasperation in the father’s voice as he responded to the incessant “whys.” Several cyclists and joggers shared my path as I wound around to a small pond. I asked the man fishing if he minded being in my pho...

When the news broke of Obama's victory, it felt like a veil was lifted. Fresh air and new hope have infiltrated the nation. As I listened to the news, watched Twitter comments and scoped news websites, I also scrambled through photos on Flickr and used them to compile my first video effort. The photos are low resolution so the quality isn't the greatest, but I still wanted to share my excitement. I hope your enjoyment is half of what I had in creating it.

The Halloween stash can be hard to manage but with parental guidance and the mantra "all things in moderation" it is possible to succumb to temptation. Yet one North Carolina dentist is noted for offering monetary incentive, much like the tooth fairy, for kids to turn in their spoils. Paying $1 per pound, this cavity fighter is buying back Halloween treats and forwarding the confections to troops. According to the U.S. Department of Defense , this dentist is not alone. I suppose it's better than the reaction from Willy Wonka's father. After trick-or-treating, Wonka had to watch his dad sort through the candy explaining why all of it was bad for the teeth. The entire booty was then thrown into the fire. This particular N.C. dentist served in the military, yet he doesn't seem to remember that chocolate can not be sent to the troops. Items that melt are among restricted items and if shipped to soldiers, will be confiscated So what happens to those wonderful snack-s...

When I took a class on interpersonal relationships (more years ago than I care to admit) the instructor stated that we always have a choice. Regardless of the situation or circumstance, there is absolutely, positively, undeniably a choice. I was among those in the class that said, "Not always - sometimes your back is against the wall, there are times ...." The teacher shook his head in opposition. "You may not like your choices, but they are always there." After digesting his statement I realized he was right and even better, his statement is liberating. We are never stuck with one option. Even if someone has a gun to your head, you have a choice - do as you are told or don't. Ultimately you have the power of making the decision and accepting the consequences of your choice. Taking choices a step further, you can opt to turn negatives into positives based on the choices you create for yourself, as proven by one woman's political statement. Shannon Bennett ...

Through the beauty of technology, the magic of networking and 30Threads.com I am sitting front and center, watching Senator Obama speak to a crowd in Raleigh. He remains consistent with his message, clarifies the slams issued by the opposition and keeps the energy high. All of these are expected and he delivers well. But there is something different today. He stopped his speech, pointed to an area calling for medical personnel and stepped over to hand off water. He isn't just scanning the crowd when he speaks. He is actually looking at people, seeing them eye to eye. A short while later, he pointed to another person needing assistance. At the end of his speech, he looked into the crowd and asked about one of the victims. A thumbs up indicated all was well. Seeing eye-to-eye on issues is visionary, seeing eye-to-eye with people is invigorating.

I believe in the underdog going for justice but in many lawsuits I wonder if the ends offer any benefit other than padding the litigator's pockets. A court just ruled against Target, awarding $3.1 million to a woman who was falsely accused of using counterfeit $100 bills. The legal tender was issued before the clerk was even born, so his gut reaction was to issue an email warning to a half-dozen other businesses in the area. One of the other businesses receiving the warning happened to be the Belk Department Store where the Target customer works in loss prevention. There are so many things wrong with this whole scenario that it's hard to know where to begin dissecting it - but I'm going to forge ahead. First, I despise $100 bills. I don't carry huge chunks of cash around so I don't need large bills to keep my wallet from stretching. On the extremely rare occasion that I may opt to pay cash for something costing a few C-notes, I will ask the bank teller for them and ...

Graphic artists do have a reputation for taking liberties with their designs practically creating a picture hunt game within any artwork. My OCD tendencies have my eyes picking out patterns in the most mundane places like wallpaper or mosaics however I have never been one to study a pack of brocolli like this woman did. Either the photographed brocolli was picked from a fairy garden or the artist got bored and photoshopped his (ahem) buds into the design. Either way, these folks are a bit green around the gills. Speaking of buds, at least these were talking heads as opposed to the naughty bits people have found in advertising like Ikea , Camel cigarettes and Coca-Cola . Are people finding this stuff because they are sexually repressed (when the design is phallic) or do they really have nothing better to do? I would say that I need to pay less attention to the nutritional charts and study the graphics more, but since I'm neither sexually repressed or bored, I'll leave the hunt t...

Virtual reality players need to heed mama's warning to "play nice" or else they could end up in jail. Two Japanese co-workers hooked up their avatars for some pretend time in the digital matrix but when the man divorced without warning, the woman murdered her estranged VR spouse . Jailed on suspicion of computer hacking, the femme fatale faces up to five years in prison and a $5,000 fine. As kids, we pretended to shoot each other with our lethal index fingers and I had teenage friends that sank deep into their imaginations with Dungeons and Dragons. Even adults reenact battles in historic parks. This woman took fantasy to a new level when she pretended to kill her cartoon husband. Her fault is encroaching reality by manipulating her opponent's software. Sabotaging another person's gear is no way to win a game and her efforts should have stayed within the confines of the computer screen. Why not dream up a hot new male avatar to make the ex-hubby jealous? Or go for...

" The only thing that separates us from the animals is our ability to accessorize." - Olympia Dukakas as Clairee Belcher in "Steel Magnolias" Looks like Palin has as much pump action on her feet as with her shotgun. Her Naughty Monkey "Double Dare" shoes are being snapped up on the web by her fashion followers. Eyeglass designer Kawasaki is thanking Palin for a surge in sales. A $750 Louis Vuitton bag hangs by Piper's side, looking more like a carry-on than a purse. Even little Trig's duds are linked at Pacifier's . Shameful spending using $150,000.00 from the Republican National Committee's budget is topped off with the irony of Palin's ability to accessorize with a Democratic scarf . One could compare her wasteful spending, total disregard to the plight of the working (and out-of-work) class, self-absorbed and self-righteous nature to the last eight years of Bush-onomics but McCain vehemently denies the likeness in his quest for the ...

"Arab and Good Person are not antithetical to one another." - Ben Affleck on Real Time with Bill Maher 10/17/08 Growing up, I learned the term "back-handed compliment" and John McCain exhibited the epitome of this idiom when he corrected a supporter's accusation of Obama being an Arab. "No he's not," said McCain. "He's a good guy ... he's not an Arab." Ok, I'll give McCain the benefit of realizing he was correcting the woman with "No he's not" and at the same time trying to reinforce that Obama is a good person instead of being a potential terrorist. I suppose it would be easy for any of us fumble our words and hope that people understand our intent. Such fallibility has passed my own lips however, I am not running for President of the United States. The person that sits in the hot seat of this universe needs to choose his or her words carefully. Not only did McCain give a back-handed insult to Obama, he insulte...

As promised in my Oct. 14 blog, solutions to the educational crises in America are available. One of the struggles is bureaucracy in the national educational system. The rest of the world is changing yet schools are stagnant in their efforts to challenge, stimulate and prepare kids for the future. I came across “The Ron Clark Story,” a movie about one educator who dared to make a difference. By watching the special features on the DVD, I learned that the story was pretty close to real life and it prompted me to do more research online. Ron Clark is originally from Aurora, NC and after teaching there several years, he heard that teachers were needed in Harlem. He packed up, moved to New York and managed to find a position at an elementary school. The principal was hesitant, but Ron took the worst class in school and by the end of the year, their test scores were the best in the school, exceeding the gifted and talented class. After winning Disney’s Best Grade 3-6 Teacher Award and Natio...

Far from being a part of the flock, the participants at ConvergeSouth 2008 are definately herders. A newbie to blogging, this was my first experience at a related conference and my head is still spinning. I'll be spending a great deal of time catching up to the technology and people that I met. Perhaps this has put me in the category of "ewe" but I'm glad to be following these folks! Definately NOT a baaaaad experience.

I can be picky to a fault. If something doesn’t look right, I’ll point it out or ask about it. Remember the “Emperor’s New Clothes” and how everyone was ooohing and ahhhing over the guy’s fine threads until the kid yelled out, “He’s not wearing anything!” I prefer a more subtle approach and try not to be rude but if something is bared before me, it’s got my attention. I submitted my resume for the local school system’s consideration – I know, I’m crazy but that’s another subject. Part of the pre-employment brouhaha includes going to a website to take the Haberman Star Teacher questionnaire. By answering 50 questions, this analyzes a person’s durability as a teacher, ability to handle situations and other enlightening skills and abilities. This site describes the 10 dimensions assessed and I found a couple of them worthy of discussion. The first one is “persistence.” To paraphrase, the test can determine if a potential teacher can work with kids who have behavioral and learning proble...

Telling you how to vote would go against the very principle of my blog. You should think about your own values and needs and make your own decision. What I can do is throw a few morsels out that you can chew on while you ponder the choices. Often, the most obvious imperfections can be masked by simple illusions. Sarah Palin flew out of John McCain’s pocket quicker than a dove from David Copperfield’s handkerchief. Dainty, delicate and dandy to look at, Palin balances McCain’s heavy hand. He seems to be banking on her ability to lure flies with honey but voters need to watch out for the SNAP of the Venus Flytrap! My best friend raised four children and rebuked some of the commentary on Palin’s speech during the republican convention. “They kept saying how she had presence and commanded attention,” my friend said. “The woman’s got five kids – she damn well better have the ability to command attention! If she can’t then there’s something wrong!” As we further considered this little barrac...

"It is not easy to construct by mere scientific synthesis a foolproof system which will lead our children in a desired direction and avoid an undesirable one. Obviously, good can come only from a continuing interplay between that which we, as students, are gradually learning and that which we believe in, as people." — Erik Homburger Erikson (1902-1994) Erik Erikson developed the theory that there are eight stages of psychosocial development in a person's life. We may go through them systematically, and develop as well-rounded, functional beings. Sustain a jolt during one of the stages and a person can get stuck or develop in an unhealthy way. He believed that a person having psychological problems could revisit the related area of development, pinpoint the issue that caused the derailment and, voila' a healthy mental state is returned. (Yes, I'm severely paraphrasing here but it's hard to squeeze a semester of psychology into one paragraph!) Now, take this the...

Letting others draw conclusions and define opinion is so much easier than thinking through issues alone. At least, that must be the reason that people are quick to jump on a bandwagon before checking the wheels. I have a friend that is a strong republican. He forwards emails to me that bash Obama but I don't complain since I know how to use my "delete" button. On Friday, CNN reported that some delegates were heading to the democratic convention with the intention of voting for Hilary Clinton. These representatives feel that if their state voted for her then they should reflect their voters' preference. The reporter went on to say that it was a type of homage to Clinton's efforts. She has publicly backed Obama and both candidates reflect a united party. Today, my friend sent an email that quotes obscure news reports of Clinton's plans to fight for the nomination at the convention. My next email is from the Clinton campaign saying the senator is looking forward ...

Mrs. Newton taught our 7th grade Social Studies class. She was a petite woman with short gray hair that was kept styled with slight curls and a bit of teasing. She always had her make-up just right though she did have more than her share of wrinkles and deep furrows along her brow - probably from teaching hormonal tweens. Her lips were accentuated with lipstick and she usually had them drawn tight. I honestly don't ever remember her smiling. It was the early 70s and my generation was aware of the Vietnam War and heard about the horrors of POW camps. Metal bracelets were worn that bore the name of a soldier missing in action or known to be captured, probably a precursor to today's colored bands for various causes. Early in the semester, Mrs. Newton was showing a film strip in class. As the record played the narration, there was a "ding" to tell the student media assistant when to advance the frame. As the voice droned on about government issues, eyelids got heavier. ...

A wolf with a shepherd's hook does not make the best herder; yet the public continually gets led by false authority figures. For many years, Jesse Jackson has been in media interviews representing various causes. He managed to ride the coattails of Martin Luther King, Jr. and has hopped into the limelight whenever possible. Throughout his career he has made gaffes fueling satire over his lack of verbal coherency, an affair resulting in a child, and showing up in any location where there is perceived racial injustice. In spite of his cartoonish reputation, there are people who actually believe he is worthy of respect and an expert in race relations and civil unrest. With elections looming in the near future, media outlets are pulling in people who are supposed analysts, experts, and party representatives. I listen to them state their cases, argue against opposing views, and give opinions about how campaigns will progress. I've even heard a couple of people say, in a disguise of ...

The debate over staying in Iraq continues in the middle of a tumultuous election year. Even though there seems to be at least two sides to the debate over the war - stay or go - there is a lot of commonality. No one wants to see American soldiers die; no one wants to give terrorism any advantage; everyone is concerned about the economy with loss of jobs and homes and increased pricing on everything. Beyond those points, we can agree to disagree. Facts and figures are floating around as American soldiers continue to face numerous hardships. Among their strifes are multiple tours of duty. Not only are troops spending long periods of time in Iraq, they come back to the United States for a short time only to return again - not just once, but two and three times! As one seasoned veteran noted, "We don't even have a draft - these soldiers are enlisting voluntarily and are being treated like this!" Enlisted personnel are returning stateside with post-traumatic stress syndrome an...

Producers and editors decide what to show in the news and without question the public dutifully absorbs whatever tidbits they are thrown. The stories may be about hostages and wildfires but viewers and readers rarely complain about being held hostage by their televisions while being fried at the flanks. We have 24-hour news services but they only run the same stories repeatedly. And anyone in a hurry has the option of a 24-hour headline channel! Instead of digging for news and offering stories in ways that might present a broader scope of issues, the media has gotten tunnel vision focusing on the almighty dollar. Recent coverage focused on the rescue of hostages in Columbia. Reports revealed a simplistic plan: locate the hostages, fly a helicopter in and take the hostages out. The helicopter was an old one previously used by the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Columbia (FARC). Oddly enough, when the chopper landed, and the rescuers pretended to be part of FARC saying, "We're mov...

In 1984, James Finn Garner's book of "Politically Correct Bedtime Stories" was published. Titles, professions and ethnicities were gaining finely tuned verbiage and Garner managed to provide a plethora of options while poking fun at the absurdity of not calling the kettle black. Yet, in real life, a speaker calling out the color of said utensil risks offending: a specific division of the human race; the manufacturer that chose the name "ebony;" and all kettle users that refer to the object's size and purpose rather than color. Avoiding offensive phrasing is exhausting. Rather than looking at reality and the intent of the speaker, critics conclude that people are racist. People have become so conscious of being criticized they actually avoid any type of descriptive terms. A woman told me of a recent conversation she had with an acquaintance. The acquaintance mentioned a person and to clarify, my friend said, "Was she a black woman?" The acquaintance...